One Tree and Me

My week on a military base in Mexico

I recently took a break from my travels and answered the call to return home. While my journey has been filled with ups and downs, from last minute housing changes to communing with kind strangers, I have learned more about faith and what it means to live in it. I have been shown fears and what it feels like to respond from a place of fear compared to leaning into faith. Even in the uncertainty.

I learned firsthand how the life you want wants you too but fear will stop you from stepping into it.

This was tested mainly in my living situations. Trusting that where I was and where I would end up would be for my betterment, to my liking, what my soul desired, and my needs met. That I would find home in all of these spaces, within myself, the environment and the people I shared space with.

My final stay in Mexico landed me on a military base on an unnamed road an hour out from the city. You are probably wondering how I got there. I was surprised too. The day I was supposed to travel to my next destination, I was at the airport and did not board the plane. I watched it take off and sat in the airport for a few more hours after departure contemplating and facing the reasons I did not get on the plane. Fear and connection. There was something strong within me that would not allow me to go.

I was exhausted by the end of the night and decided to check into a nearby hotel. There were only two options. Holiday Inn or Santa Lucia. One was familiar and more pricey, the other was unknown and more affordable. It had no website, only a flyer. I trusted it. Got a taxi and in the dark of the night arrived, unaware of it’s surrounding area. I was the only guest in the lobby. Once I got to my room and saw it was in quality standing, I immediately went to sleep.

I woke the next morning and looked out the window. Blank space, aircraft paraphernalia and soldiers in uniforms boarding their bus to depart for their day. I was on a base. Brought to a place of isolation, structure, and stillness. All things I had been calling for to settle my spirit. Also things I had been fearing. The biggest downfall - there was only one tree. One tree and Me. Each other’s companions for the week.

God has a way of placing you where you need to be to get your attention and see yourself more clearly, oftentimes in unconventional ways, but you will always be safe and have what you need. It was deeper than just a place to rest my head for the week. It became a safe haven for my mind, which I had been battling throughout my travels. The lack of pressure and distractions brought me to a place of peace. My mind became still, able to discern God’s voice, my voice and the voice of the enemy.

God is the calm conviction
The enemy is confusion
The flesh is condemnation

It was here that I got a hold of my own brutal inner critic and allowed a kinder voice, a more assured and compassionate voice to come in. It was here that I surrendered to stillness and silence long enough to hear the subtle voice of God. Beyond the trees, the voice showed up in Me.

“For where I am taking you, you must be prepared. That starts in your mind” I was a soldier in training. If you can conquer your own mind and thoughts, you have won. Our thoughts hold power and dictate our beliefs, feed our doubts, and separate us from our body’s natural intuition. I relearned intimately what it felt like to betray my body, to betray my values, betray my needs. A lesson I am familiar with but it has new ways of showing up and sometimes we need to relearn to continue breaking the cycle.

I stayed on this base all week. Arrived on a Monday and left on Saturday. My mind found peace in this place. It expanded. I was the only Black and english speaking person at the hotel. It forced me out of my comfort zone. I interacted with nationalities I otherwise may have not been open to. Found intimacy and communication that stretched beyond native tongue. My mind and heart experienced a perspective shift and for that I am grateful.

I’ve had a surge of inspiration in my writing since returning home. I look forward to sharing more of the wisdom gained along the way.

Until next time, Friends.

Grace

Everywhere is Beautiful if you are present to it